My Crazy Parkinson's Life
“Been There, Done That”
This blog is dedicated to Bill McCarthy an American hero of which there is never enough of. He will be missed, but his legend will live on in those who knew him, God Speed.
I never thought about changing careers in my 60’s, I was on disability and perfectly happy living my life as a person with Parkinson’s. But sometimes in life there comes an opportunity that is too good to pass up. Few people know this, but I was astronaut. I don’t like to brag, so I kind of keep it on the down low. You might be asking yourself, “what the h#ll is he talking about, he can’t even stand flying to LA”, trust me, I was an astronaut. The question you should be asking, is why did I become an astronaut at such a late age and I hate flying so much, let’s just say I am competitive.
We had a tradition at Rock Steady Boxing (pre-covid) to have “get to know you” sessions where would talk about our hobbies, careers, favorite movies etc., it could be pretty entertaining. Well on this day, a new boxer arrived and his name was Bill McCarthy, he was wearing a ballcap and shirt with CIA logos on them. I thought, “cool he shops at Spencer’s too”, but his stuff looked better than the stuff I had bought, I was jealous. Then the daily question was asked, “what did you do in your career?”. Since Bill was the “new” guy he was asked the question first, his answer would launch my career into space.
Bill calmly told us he was a Green Beret in Vietnam, and became a CIA agent stationed in Southeast Asia most of his career. The whole group was all googly eyed, we had in our group a real-life Jack Reacher, how cool is that? Obliviously not cool enough, because when they got around to me, I was ready. When asked what I had done for my career I firmly stated, “I was an Astronaut”, the smart ones laughed, the gullible ones looked at me with admiration. I then did what any good BS artist does, I doubled down. I told the group I was head of NASA’s “Inner Planetary Reproductive Research Team”, shooting instructional videos, top that CIA GUY! My being an astronaut became a running joke for quite some time, until Lyle’s wife Kerry came up to me at a Parkinson’s event and said, “hey A-Hole, you’re not an astronaut”, the last of the believers was gone, it was a sad day indeed.
Soon after being exposed, Bill and his wife Chris had a party at their home, so I decided to go check out the competition. I was not ready for what I saw, this dude has literally “been there and done that”’ Every wall was a look into the amazing life of Bill McCarthy. There was Bill the Green Beret, CIA agent, award winning chef, skydiver, sommelier, motorcyclist, scuba diver, everything but an astronaut, I KNEW IT! I was speechless and that is saying something. But true to my character, I took one last shot at him, I asked him if he had ever performed a HALO jump? For those who don’t know what that is, it jumping out of a plane at 30,000 to 40,000 feet wearing an oxygen tank, free falling at 130MPH for up to two minutes, and deploying the parachute as low as 800 feet from the ground, it’s crazy stuff. Bill just smiled and said yep, and took another sip of wine, satisfied that I was put firmly in my place.
People like Bill amaze me, they are everything I am not, they are fearless, self-confident, resourceful, and most of all they are willing to put their lives on the line, so people like you and I can live free. I compared Bill to Jack Reacher, but after looking at Bill’s life, it is the opposite, Jack Reacher is a fictional Bill McCarthy, without the cooking skills, God Bless and see you on the Moon.